Tuesday, January 31, 2006

visiting yesterday was kind of boring. woke up late and i had t leave t the first house without make up. came home, made up and left for the next two houses. it seems that i received lesser red packets this year. apparently, some people are getting more stingy but thank god i didn't receive any two bucks red packet. yea, you may say it isn't the amount that counts BUT actually inside everyone hope that they'll receive more..

relatives, my sisters friends and mine came over t visit today. the house was quite filled with people. uncle was being an irritant as usual, so whatever. guess i'm not really in a gambling mood, so i didn't play today just sat around and watch.

we went down t lido t catch the movie i not stupid. i give it 4 out of 5 popcorns. really touching show and hilarious show. sherlyn and i teared, its like a must watch show know.....

oh...... AM LOVING LEON....((x
my super sweet baby...

& BABY I NEED YOUR LOVIN' ; 3:32 AM


Tuesday, January 24, 2006

update update...

sat ;

woke up early but i was still late. went over t eve's place we baked cookies for them* headed down town t meet up with leon, vince and ong. walked around, screwed day. there were 3 guys at puma talking t eve and us, they weren't local. americans i guess? they said i don't look like a local, a thai instead. asked us where were we gg that night.

eve and i went over t indochine t meet ting, lia and sel. josh, daryl, aug, wayne, marina, wendy, regi and benji. went t nude bar, the live band was steamy but the dj played boring R&B followed by special request of techno remix after that WHICH SUCKED T THE MAX. so we request R&B but it was remix, crap. at that point of time regi and i really wanted t head down t liquid. rahh. you can't imagine how bad it was.

got high with the beer and the irritating music made me worst. it's been a long long time since i danced with my ladys. the day was totally f uped, yes i mean totally.

SUN ;

met baby, eve and vince. i was late again, as usual. i've gotta kick of that bad habit! vince and eve watched cheaper by a dozen 2. baby and i watched undiscovered, cramp up dumb cinema. the vain faggot infront of me made it worst, you just feel like giving a wonder kick t his dearest john.

met up after the show tgt with ong and another friend of theirs. chilled and we left for home. first time taking public transport with him luh.

MON ;

went t far east with mum, sis and her bf. walked around followed by dinner ; chicken rice. went over t get orchard emerald side then t john little. met sel and josh along with mum. bought some make up. josh drew his imaginary friend PETER again, using the eyeliners. went up t get my bed sheets! black and red bed sheets (((:(((; too bad no gold bed sheets. PLAIN with no designs.

went over t cine, they had their dinner. i had eyephones stucked in my ears and read mags. ting came over after work then i left t meet leon.

TODAY ;

STAY HOME DAY! i finally manage t squeeze out time t upload pics into imagestation. FINALLY. the links are up alr.

insecurities and past haunts me once again
i want you, theres no doubt.

& BABY I NEED YOUR LOVIN' ; 5:33 PM


Saturday, January 21, 2006

its a sad case that you take quite some time t mature. cause you don't act your age and you don't have the mentality of a 19 year old teen. my heart goes out t you, kid. why push the blame t others when we all know its you who is in the wrong. its pointless quarrelling with you, a total waste of time. t hell with you-

i wanted t get the fcuk jeans today instead i bought a black pants from warehouse cause baby has been asking me t wear pants instead of jeans. guess i won't be getting the red baby doll top from song+kelly21 cause it doesn't go well together.

has someone caught your heart
you don't know how it feels.

& BABY I NEED YOUR LOVIN' ; 1:38 AM


Thursday, January 19, 2006

prolly you found another
this treatment is torturing
i've lost my mood
i've lost in everything

& BABY I NEED YOUR LOVIN' ; 1:06 AM


Wednesday, January 18, 2006

today's gonna be my last day at song+kelly21. the last few days were fun cause i talked alot t the ck and aj part timers. though there was fun but the standing hours with my heels on still tortured me slowly, daily torture.

7 days working there ; nice colleagues, nice part-timers around and nice in-charge. tisa, jing quan, huiting, arron, kim, amanda and meihong made my life there better. OH SO FRIENDLY PART TIMERS. i think cass is the sweetest girl in song+kelly21, she looks like a doll with fair skin tone and big eyes. got along well with the rest ; cathy, amanda, rachel, amber and yati. all friendly people except i didn't talk t yati much. prolly it's the age gap.

when there are afew customers it's the trying on clothes time. oh and this baby doll top extremly nice but it's pretty expensive. the cheapest top i saw there was 119 and the most expensive was 999. it all ends with a 9 at the back. now i know that sales line is so tiring, didn't have enough sleep. i still prefer working at flesh imp but ps side wouldn't be my choice still prefer wisma.

lifes been treating me fair but i guess more t the bad side. many thoughts running through my mind, daily fears i've got and i can't shake them off my mind. sigh...

do you, as much as i do
then again, do you even
i don't feel myself standing anywhere
i can't really feel you
am i just another
guess your affection ain't deep
treatment of hots and colds
waiting for text replies and calls
hoping for text and calls
this is tearing me apart slowly
i pretend t be just so fine
afraid of outcomes if i were t tell you all these
so i rather keep it t myself
i hate all these feelings in me
i'm sinking deeper
i guess your still on the surface
i want t grab your heart
but when i'm climbing up
i keep slipping
as you kept pushing me away
i fall hard and land on concrete
laying there, i bleed
i pick myself up and give it a shot again
everyday i wish you would love me more
am afraid t lose you, are you
tears shed, blood dripped
come close t hear the heart breaking
deep affection and devotion
baby, all i need is you

& BABY I NEED YOUR LOVIN' ; 3:03 PM


Monday, January 16, 2006

daily fears
fears of sleeping
dreads t wake up
because of you
security needed please.

& BABY I NEED YOUR LOVIN' ; 12:23 AM


Friday, January 13, 2006

i fear to lose you one day.
will you let me hold on to you till the day i leave this world?
baby, nobody can ever take your place.
only you can make my heart beat faster.
my only one.

& BABY I NEED YOUR LOVIN' ; 1:10 AM


Wednesday, January 11, 2006

i can't sleep, truckloads of things on my mind, am thinking alot and i'm missing my hot stuff )x after an hour and a half of tossing and turning i decided t get up and blog hopefully i'll be able t sleep after this entry. was reading something just now and it made me think alot. i really pity that teen cause i've expierence such shait before. really saddening. tormented. i will never wanna be in that shait hole ever again.

a promise made t you;
i'll never let you go
trust me on that
-my perfect hot stuff love.

& BABY I NEED YOUR LOVIN' ; 5:28 AM


Tuesday, January 10, 2006

mount faber last night was enjoyable. eve and i walked rocky up all the way after we came back from town. it was dark and kinda remote not forgetting it was arnd midnight, once every ten minutes you can see a car driving up. reminded me of the song boulevard of broken dreams ; ' i walk a lonely road'. baby and vince came up t find us and we continued walking up. the scenery was great but his company made it perfect.

oh another thing, he slip and rolled down the steps cause they wanted t go pee. poor baby he has injuries on both his hands and legs with algae stains on his jeans and tee. he had a hard time walking down but he managed to. the water kept splashing as i walked down, irritated me large scale! i'll be starting work tmr again, hope its fine )x

to hell with guys that has big egos
its the same as saying to hell with dad
i don't give a shit about him
cause i don't see a need to

& BABY I NEED YOUR LOVIN' ; 4:58 PM


Monday, January 09, 2006

didn't manage t go t night safari. firstly, we had dinner and so it kinda cross the time we wanted t reach there. secondly, the package decided t back out as it was raining or rather drizzling. thirdly, we won't enjoy it if it was going t drizzling the whole time.

actually, we kinda sense it that they weren't that keen on going. oh wells, next week they said but i guess not other plans made. we ended up catching a good show and then down t pauliners, i think its spelt that way. the live band was not bad, chilled there. it drizzling and rained almost the whole damn day and when we about t leave, a heavy downpour. ran t the cab with vince and leon and we all got wet. was extremly cold and the inconsiderate taxi driver wasn't even automatic t turn down the aircon, how frustrating. went over t babys place and left around 5 when the rain wasn't so heavy. can't believe i spent so much. CANDICE IS BROKE, WHO WANNA DONATE T CANDICE FUND?

when i woke up today it was raining heavily and it kept raining non-stop. i think some parts of sgp is flooded. seriously, base on the rainfall i think there would be alil flood. feeling chilly, i want baby's warm hug. haha. even now, the i can feel the cold wind against my bod. mann i wish he was right by me.

met baby, eve, vince and ong at taka. mom didn't wanna fetch me today as it was raining heavily, she fetched me t the mrt instead. earphones plugged into my ear the whole time and soon i reached taka. walked around found a pair of working pants at zara, am gna get it tmr. i have to cause i was too lazy to get it today. they got their milkshakes and we headed t holland. FYI, it was still pouring. settled and breko and i had potato wedges and mocha twist with ice-cream for my dinner, fattening yes i know. sent vince t maju camp and we were finding a place t go. ended up somewhere near parklane where they sell beancurd.

the shop was full so we sat at the filthy back alley. chat, chill, laugh and stories. the place was so filthy that a cockroach actually crawled onto babys hand, HOW GROSS. he flinged it and accidentally stepped on my foot and i screamed cause i didn't know what happen. i was about t stand up and leave and that assed up cockroached appeared! i screamed again. ong took the feelers wanting t bring it t me and that was the time when i screamed the loudest and was about t run. right, this may sound alil bimbotic but seriously, it's a major turn off.

ong sent eve home then me, thanks alot (; while walking back home i saw a cockroach and it wasn't moving so i thought it was dead not forgetting it looked smashed so i took a bigger step wanting t cross it and it ran i lost my balance but thank god i didn't fall. i just killed another cockroach with baygon in my kitchen just now. omg, whats with me and cockroaches today man!

baby, you've been a sweetheart
i wanna keep you for long.

& BABY I NEED YOUR LOVIN' ; 4:32 AM


Saturday, January 07, 2006

woke up late again. was at the gym and i could actually fall asleep there, that shows how sleepy i was. went up t mel's grannys house, there was alil change of the interior design. the dining room looks oriental with the new wallpaper and gold ceiling, stylo ain't it? her sofa looked so helena, i love that colour ; rosewood. mum fetched me and we headed t great world.

planned t meet eve at 5 but i only got home close t 7. so i ended up meeting jaslin and eve arnd 9 at far east. ate alil at sakura thai and we walked around t digest. josh, celeste, ezhaq, daryl and sherwin came over from heeren t meet us. saw a few nice tees and not only branded tees are nice. most of them left, leaving eve, daryl and i so we headed t lido's mccafe t meet ting. daryl was being nice and bought fries for us cause it was drizzling, thanks man ((; chilled and talk. we called a cab and headed home sweet home.

i needa sleep early, i need my sleep, i've gotta wake up early tmr! pray hard that it won't rain tmr so that we'll be able t go night safari!
oh did i mention, smelly got me a xmas present! ((((; thanks smelly!! it comes in three and i've got one of it, does it represent us?

you'll never know
cause you refuse to
though i wish that you knew everything
baby you're the one
i'll be standing at the door of your heart
it's your choice
if you wanna open the door and let me in
i wanna be in your heart, can i?

& BABY I NEED YOUR LOVIN' ; 2:13 AM


Friday, January 06, 2006

been occupied with many things these few days. am lack of sleep and my dark eye rings and eye bags are getting worst.

oh wells, slept only for 3 hours today and i had t wake up for work. planned t wake up at 9.30 but i woke up an hour later luckily i wasn't late for work. had lunch with mom and she fetched me t ps. flesh imp at ps is really boring cause there isn't much of a crowd so den and i just tag the tees. he was sick so bought panadol and he slept while i serve, 6.30 desmond came. a punk rocker who plays the bass guitar.

left t lido's mccafe and met up with eve, ting, regi, daryl, sherwin, joshua and selwyn, chilled, cam whoring as usual and fagging. went over t wisma t get my paycheck then down t cine for dinner (; bought tix for eliz town. sher, leon, yig ; sat tgt and the rest except selwyn, he went home.

am off t sleep. gym-ing and town-ing later on (;

& BABY I NEED YOUR LOVIN' ; 5:02 AM


Monday, January 02, 2006

never gone, never far

in my heart is where you are

always close, everyday

every step along the way

new years eve wasn't really that great after all. went for dinner at west coast, pool and down t liquid got high by the shots followed by a terrible lost of mood. well, now i know what he isn't happy bout me. i'll try t change but sad t hear of somethings that he couldn't actually see. no smoking anymore even when clubbing though its quite difficult but i've gotta do it. besides mums quite unhappy with me smoking too. no more fags-

eve said ; "you put so much effort then now you want it t be like that isit"

well, i don't want things t be bad a single bit. they all know he is important t me and effort was put in but he just couldn't see it. sad case ain't it. enthu t meet him, obviously i was always. he means the world t me, HE MEANS EVERYTHING T ME but he can't feel it. initiative i will be, different from the others but i accept it. i do give a shit about him, why wouldn't i. i just hope things will be on the right track and better or are we just not meant to? i wanna change it if so.

that darling is way too precious.

maybe its me

maybe its him

maybe its us

then again, maybe its just me.

EMOEMOEMOING

& BABY I NEED YOUR LOVIN' ; 12:31 AM